I think many of us believe we’re going to be the only ones in history to defy the natural order of things and live forever. I know I do. But in case that’s not true, it behooves us to get our affairs in order before we take that final trip. And the sooner we do it the better, seeing as that trip is usually unplanned.
You might think this is a strange topic to discuss in a humor column. But when you have frequent deadlines as I do, you’ll write about almost anything. Next time, I’ll be discussing floor care. I hope you enjoy it.
Anyway, when I use the word “affairs,” I’m referring to financial accounts, property and personal and medical information, not illicit relationships, though if you have any of those, you should probably get them in order too.
The idea of getting affairs in order has been on my mind ever since I realized my husband and I should update our wills. We had them drawn up when our son was born 26 years ago. And it recently occurred to me that at this point he probably won’t want to move in with his aunt and uncle if anything happens to us, and not just because they no longer have the dog they had when he was growing up.
We did update them and I’m proud of us for that. Every responsible adult should have an up-to-date will—and they should put me in it. I’m joking—sort of. But the process got me thinking about the importance of taking care of other business as well. No one wants to leave a mess for their family to deal with—unless they don’t like their family very much.
Plus don’t we all want them to think the best of us when we’re gone? Imagine your grandchildren many years from now, sitting around the kitchen table telling stories. One of them says, “Grandma seemed pretty with it until I had to clean out her house.” Before you know it, they’ll be discussing the muddle your affairs were in and you won’t be there to defend yourself.
Even if you don’t give a darn what your family thinks, taking care of these things now will leave you feeling organized and in control. At least that’s what several online articles I read about the subject say. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to feel organized and in control.
So I took the advice of the article authors and set about creating files of personal and financial information specifically for the poor soul who will have to tie up loose ends for me 50 or 60 years from now. As you can see, I’m an optimist.
I thought this would be a lot easier than it was since we don’t have that much in the way of finances. But if I had as many dollars in my accounts as I do documents about my accounts I could pay someone else to take care of all this for me.
Several articles suggested we should jot down information for our obituaries too. It will be fun, they said. No they didn’t say that. But they did point out that if we write a draft of our own obituary, at least the facts will be right—or wrong depending on what we want people to think. Maybe you’ve noticed by now, I never pass up an opportunity to embellish. I did write up rough drafts for both my husband and me and his at least is accurate.
I’m sure there’s much more I can do but I feel good about what I’ve done so far. I think family members will thank me for making their burden lighter when the time comes, though presumably I won’t be able to hear them do it.
Dorothy Rosby is the author of Alexa’s a Spy and Other Things to Be Ticked off About, Humorous Essays on the Hassles of Our Time and other books. Contact her at www.dorothyrosby.com/contact.